
Cast:
Purdy Holsom
Hannan Azlan
Jacinta Fehn
Kater G
Liliana Velasquez
Video Production: BadKat
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LYRICS:
Gay Money
Intro (Spoken):
This one’s for all of them people who didn’t want to sell things to the gays in protest of gay marriage…y’all stuuuupid.
Ya haterators missing out on a gold mine
Dual money, no kids, we living real fine
Bargain shopping got my savings high, bread stacked
Ya breed-feeders dragging axles on a Cadallac
I’m Whole Foods, you be shopping at Bi-Lo
Ya grandmama shop both, yeah, she bi, though
I’m flashing Toms, hey I’m ecologilicious
Quinoa on my plate–nutritious
I wear things made of hemp, sport the lifestyle
Short hair, softball, hyphen wife isle
Volvo with the veggie fuel in it
Cruise through my hood, bumping folk music with my
Chorus:
Gay Money, Gay Money, Gay Money, Gay Money
When you’re thinking that your baby daddy’s after ya,
We be picking up a baby from Africa
Gay Money, Gay Money, Gay Money, Gay Money
Maternity leave? No need.
I’m the only one coming out my beav
You gotta be dumb if you don’t wanna sell to me
I drop 3K every Gay Day at Disney
And I ain’t saying I’m materialistic,
But if I don’t get those shoes, I’ll go f—— ballistic!
My hubby owns airplanes, shares ’em with me
But you won’t sell me sandwiches ’cause…Christianity?
I’m sorry–but what have YOU been eating Sundays,
Ya wine-sipping, single man flesh eatin’ fundies
And I don’t wanna sound like I’m irate,
But cash burns the same way, gay or straight
Even bi folks and tri folks, the kinks and the polys
I’ll serve ’em all as I pile up some more of my
Chorus:
Gay Money, Gay Money, Gay Money, Gay Money
When you’re thinking that your baby daddy’s after ya,
We’ll be picking out some really cute hats for ya
Gay Money, Gay Money, Gay Money, Gay Money
Maternity leave? Girl, please.
Ain’t neither of us having pregnancies, okaaaaay
Spoken:
Wait a sec, everything you just said could apply to straight people with the kids, or who have money.
[Lesbian]So?
[Gay Man] Yeah, so?
So what you’re really saying is that everyone potentially has money, and is therefore a valuable consumer?
[Lesbian] I mean, if you want to buy into rampant consumerism…
[Gay Man] Oh, screw this conversation! Let’s go shopping!
Outro:
Picking up a baby from Africa (Gay Money), picking up a baby from Antarctica (Gay Money), picking up a baby from the dollar store (Gay Money)
It’s all money.